Funny and Stupid Ideas: 01 May 2001

Two-seater bike - for one

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A Chinese man has invented a two-seater bicycle - for one person.

A Beijing bicycle shop owner invented this two-seater bike for one. It enables the rider to sit in different positions /Lu Feng

The rider can choose which seat to sit on depending on the conditions, reports the Beijing Youth Daily.

Luo Jianping, who owns a bicycle shop in Beijing, came up with the idea.

"Riders can change positions during riding, which is good for their health," he claimed.

Luo has applied for a patent and is looking for a manufacturer to produce his invention.

He added: "On the higher seat, you can save around a third of your energy, since your weight can push the wheels even faster.

"The lower seat is more suitable for the busy streets, as it's easy for the rider to stop the bike with his feet supporting him."

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Here's a blonde's answer on geometry test

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Here's a blonde's answer on geometry test

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Penis Land?

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 Pen islandPenis Land? Nope.

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I still don't understand this

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How many people do you see?

I still don't understand this

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Razor Blade Soap

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A real razor blade in a bar of soap. Be at the cutting edge of hygiene.

Razor Blade Soap

FOR DECORATIVE PURPOSES ONLY! So they say.

Order some razor blade soap here.

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Grandmother ran cannabis cookery club for neighbours

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A retired restaurateur has admitted raising a kitty with other pensioners to buy cannabis which she used in her recipes for "medicinal purposes".

Patricia Tabram, a grey-haired grandmother, turned to the drug in an attempt to offset the effects of tinnitus, mild depression and pains after a car crash.


Patricia Tabram
Patricia Tabram

She began using it in soups, cakes and hot pots in her country kitchen and introduced others to the secret ingredient. Police raided her stone-built cottage in the village of Humshaugh, near Hexham, Northumberland, after a tip-off.

Tabram, 66, was formally cautioned in May last year for possession and cultivation of cannabis after 10in high plants were found growing in her loft. A month later she was caught with 242gms of the drug worth around £850 and self-seal bags for distribution to other people who she declined to name.

She told police that she had clubbed together with a group of elderly people to obtain cannabis for various medicinal reasons. Carl Gumsley, her defence counsel, told Newcastle Crown Court: "She had purchased it on their behalf."

Tabram admitted possessing cannabis with intent to supply and sentence was adjourned until March 11 to await reports from a probation officer and psychologist. She appeared in court in spectacles and a black cardigan and was remanded on bail with a condition of residence.

Wearing a woollen shawl in her well-stocked kitchen after the hearing, she said that she was writing a book entitled Grandma Eats Cannabis.

She said: "If they send me to jail I can finish writing my book about the merits of medicinal, herbal cannabis. I want people to know NHS medicines are poisoning them instead of treating their illness. If Jeffrey Archer can write a book in prison, so can I."

Tabram ran the Zodiac Centre restaurant in Edinburgh with her former husband and suffered depression after the death of her 14-year-old son Duncan in 1975. Her second husband died from cancer, she suffers from a lower back injury sustained in a road crash and also has arthritic knees.

She said: "Several friends found out my interest and how I liked to bake it in my food to help ease my ailment. I have taught others how to cook with it."

Tabram admitted to being scared when she first began travelling to Byker, Newcastle, to obtain the drug.

She said: "I had been going by bus to get small amounts at around £20 a time. It was all I could afford as a pensioner. It was used in the cooking. When I got a chance to get more and help out friends, I met a supplier. I hadn't asked them to contribute, they wanted the stuff to help them relieve pain."

Police seized the drug, along with diaries, nail scissors and books, at her home before she had time to distribute it to the people she says had put in around £150 each.

Tabram added: "The first time I had it, it was a friend who gave me a cannabis cigarette, but that only gives you a high for about 30 minutes. I researched it on the internet and found that if you took just a little bit of it with your food the effects last for five hours or more.

"So I started to make cannabis chocolate cake and that covered all the pain I had so well. I cook for everybody, all the neighbours, and I am teaching them so they can cook some of the things themselves.

"The most popular recipes I have are for lemon and lime cheesecake and chicken and leek pie. I want to publish a cook book with all of them in."

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Japan’s Very Own Air-Shower System

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Japan’s Very Own Air-Shower System

By David Ponce

How’s an air-shower grab ya? Well, that’s exactly the sort of fun you can choose to subject yourself to if you happen to live in the Riche Tamagawa Riverside complex located in Tokyo’s Ota-ku. Located near the entrance, this “air-showersystem is meant to remove pollen, dust and other allergens from your person before you enter your immaculate sanctuary. It’s 2 meters tall and 90 centimeters wide, and contains 12 nozzles that pump air all over you for 20 seconds, presumably enough time to fluff you up real good.

An official of Mazya Housing that developed the condominium complex said that the apartments in the structure are selling well.

The person who came up with the idea to place the air-shower in the building suffers from hay fever. The company is now considering the possibility of developing another housing complex equipped with the air-shower system.

I’m not sure how well this would sell in the US, but if there a $4billion market for pet products, there’s got to be some love left for something like this.

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Bolivian women wrestlers

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thanks to Gawker, we found the NYT's article on the fantastic Bolivian wrestling circuit, and the kick ass women who rule it...

Bolivian_wrestler

Bolivian_wrestling

"Wrestlers warming up in El Alto, Bolivia, near La Paz. Indigenous women, dressed in their traditional garb, are the stars of the increasingly popular bouts, Bolivia’s version of the World Wrestling Federation."

(Photo credit: Noah Friedman-Rudovsky/The New York Times)

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How to Dispose of a Goldfish That Has Died

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When your beloved pet goldfish turns "belly-up" take these precautions as you escort him to the great beyond.



Steps:
1. Use a mesh net to remove the dead goldfish from its tank.


2. Place the goldfish in a small box and bury it outdoors if you prefer. Be sure to make a deep hole so neighborhood pets won't get curious and start digging.


3. Place your goldfish on a saucer or wrap it up in tissue if you'd like to dispose of it the other way.


4. Go into the bathroom.


5. Slide the dead fish off the saucer into the toilet bowl, or throw the tissue-wrapped fish in the toilet.


6. Say a few words of respect to the dearly departed, if you wish.


7. Flush.


8. Wash your hands and the saucer (if you used one) thoroughly with soap and hot water.


9. Consider changing the tank water and cleaning the net and tank thoroughly if you have other fish or want to get a new one, in case your pet died of disease.


10. Ask your local pet store what type of fish tank cleaning product is appropriate for the net and tank, and clean the tank thoroughly.




Warnings:
Soap and cleaning detergents are hazardous to fish. Avoid using these products unless you're dying to officiate another fish funeral.
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Digital Trumpet

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MDT In Case
It looks more like a machine gun.

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